All relationships are based on how you communicate with our partners, family and other people and lets face it, we all, myself included, could be a lot better at this. By improving how you communicate with other people you will improve relationships, build rapport and gain a deeper level of understanding about how they feel. NLP can be used to enhance and improve this.
By paying more attention to what people are saying both verbally and non-verbally, not just in their words or actions, but also by the underlying message in their communication you will build a greater understanding and connection with the person.
Imagine you are a cameraman taking pictures with your eyes of a beautiful model, watching their every movement but also absorbing every word, imagine how special that would make the other person feel. You will focus not just on the words they use but how they use them, vocal tonality, pitch, speed and volume, as well as how they emphasise certain words, all play important factors in what is being communicated. Remember it has been said when we communicate face to face with others 93% of our message comes from our tone of voice and body language non-verbally, with only 7% coming from the words we use.
So to improve relationships make an effort to look at the person who is talking to you and actively listen to what they are saying. You will be amazed at the effect this has on the person who is talking and how much more you will understand what they are trying to say. After all good relationships are about how well we know and like the other person.
One final warning, actively listening and looking at the other person will make you more attractive to them, as a friend, partner or potential partner, so remember what outcome you want from your conversation.
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Jason J Scoltock
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